Funny Quotes Of Love

Funny Quotes Of Love Biography

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Love is not always romantic. It can be funny at times. Here is a collection of Funny Love Quotes. Fun and jokes are essential ingredients of a healthy love relationship. Start your romantic moments with these funny love quotes or by referring funny quotes about love.A man commented to his lunch companion: My wife had a funny dream last night. She dreamed she'd married a millionaire. You're lucky, sighed the companion. My wife dreams that in the daytime.
People always ask me 'Were you funny as a child?' Well, I was an accountant.
The golden rule of work is that the bosses jokes are ALWAYS funny.
Robert Redford used to be such a handsome man and now look at him: everything has dropped, expanded and turned a funny colour.
Funny thing how you first meet the woman that you marry. I first met the wife in a tunnel of love. She was digging it.
They say he's [Yogi Berra] funny. Well, he has a lovely wife and family, a beautiful home, money in the bank, and he plays golf with millionaires. What's funny about that?"
Fake news executives are nicer than real news executives, though real news executives are funnier than fake news executives. They dont know theyre being funny.
I am sitting here looking at the most amazing person I have ever seen, smart, funny, caring, and absolutely stunning! Yes, I am looking in the mirror!
Weird people are funny. If you're just completely normal, you're boring. So I so much prefer weird people to boring people.
An archaeologist is the best husband a woman can have. The older she gets the more interested he is in her.
A foolish man tells a woman to stop talking, but a wise man tells her that her mouth is extremely beautiful when her lips are closed
A pessimist is a man who thinks all women are bad. An optimist is one who hopes they are.
Friends are like bras: close to your heart and there for support.
One of life's greatest mysteries is how the boy who wasn't good enough to marry your daughter can be the father of the smartest grandchild in the world
A government that robs Peter to pay Paul can always depend on the support of Paul.
A lot of people are afraid of heights. Not me, I'm afraid of widths.
All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn't hurt.
Be able to go shopping for a bathing suit and not become depressed afterward.
Every man has his follies - and often they are the most interesting thing he has got.
Everybody knows how to raise children, except the people who have them.
Fatherhood is pretending the present you love most is soap-on-a-rope.
Have enough sense to know, ahead of time, when your skills will not extend to wallpapering.
Human beings are the only creatures on earth that allow their children to come back home.
I busted a mirror and got seven years bad luck, but my lawyer thinks he can get me five.
I did not have three thousand pairs of shoes, I had one thousand and sixty.a
I distrust camels, and anyone else who can go a week without a drink.
I don't think anyone should write their autobiography until after they're dead.
I found there was only one way to look thin, hang out with fat people.
I have tried to know absolutely nothing about a great many things, and I have succeeded fairly well.
I intend to live forever. So far, so good.
I knew I was an unwanted baby when I saw that my bath toys were a toaster and a radio.
I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.
I never drink water because of the disgusting things that fish do in it.
I never expected to see the day when girls would get sunburned in the places they now do.
I sang in the choir for years, even though my family belonged to another church.
I was sleeping the other night, alone, thanks to the exterminator.
I will not eat oysters. I want my food dead. Not sick. Not wounded. Dead.l reach for your hand in the cold of winter, I’ll reach for your hand in the heat of summer. But if my short life can’t reach the dawn of spring, I promise, in heaven, I’ll reach you with my wings.
If you hide, I’ll seek for you. If you’re lost, I’ll search for you. If you leave, I’ll wait for you. If they try to take you away from me, I’ll fight for you. Cause I never want to lose someone I love.
I know your life can go on without me, that you can be happy without me, that you can survive without me. But even if you turn me away, I will still choose to stay with you and be your sweetest stranger forever.
I don’t know why I keep on loving you despite the fact that I’ll get hurt again just like before. I never learn cause I don’t want to. Not now when I’m still strong to fall for you over and over again.
If someone would ask me what a beautiful life means, I would lean my head on your shoulder, hold you close to me and answer with a smile, “Like this.”
There’s a love that only you can give, a smile that only your lips can show, a twinkle that can only be seen in your eyes and my life that only you can complete.
You’re one of the people I never asked from God but still, He gave you to me. I asked Him why, He said, “Because he can fill your life like no one else can.”
If I can just make everything fall where it should be, I would. If I could make life better for you, I would. But I can’t. All I can do is to let you know that mine has been better because of you.
When I say I love you, please believe it’s true. When I say forever, know I’ll never leave you. When I say goodbye, promise me you won’t cry. Cause the day I’ll be saying that would be the day I die.
Death scares the hell out of me. I don’t wanna die knowing that you’ll cry over me but if death means watching over you and being with you, I might as well take my life just for you.
Would you believe me if I tell you that I love you so much? Actually, I’d prefer it if you won’t. Why? So that I can spend the rest of my life proving to you how much I do.
We spend most of our time talking about nothing but I just want to let you know that all these nothings mean so much more to me than so many somethings.
Sometimes it's a form of love just to talk to somebody that you have nothing in common with and still be fascinated by their presence. ~David Byrne
Love is a game that two can play and both win. ~Eva Gabor
Poetry spills from the cracks of a broken heart, but flows from one which is loved. ~Christopher Paul Rubero
The heart has its reasons that reason knows nothing of. ~Blaise Pascal, Pensées, 1670
I'm so in love, every time I look at you my soul gets dizzy. ~Jaesse Tyler
We're all a little weird. And life is a little weird. And when we find someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours, we join up with them and fall into mutually satisfying weirdness - and call it love - true love. ~Robert Fulghum, True Love
Love is missing someone whenever you're apart, but somehow feeling warm inside because you're close in heart. ~Kay Knudsen
You learn to like someone when you find out what makes them laugh, but you can never truly love someone until you find out what makes them cry. ~Author Unknown
True love is when you put someone on a pedestal, and they fall - but you are there to catch them. ~Author Unknown
You know when you have found your prince because you not only have a smile on your face but in your heart as well. ~Author Unknown
Love puts the fun in together, the sad in apart, and the joy in a heart. ~Author Unknown
I climbed up the door and opened the stairs,
Said my pajamas and put on my prayers,
Then I turned off the bed and crawled into the light
All because you kissed me goodnight!