Funny Motivational Quotes

Funny Motivational Quotes Biography

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Motivational quotes are like a gentle nudge (or sometimes a swift kick) in the side that keeps you focused on whatever your goals may be. When they are funny motivational quotes ... whether they are straightforward amusing, ironic, or subtly funny ... they have the added benefit of making you laugh.
Below are 25 top funny motivational quotes from famous funny people like Buster Guru to otherwise normally more "serious" well known people. Choose your favorites and stick them on your mirror, the walls, your car dashboard, the refrigerator, your forehead, or wherever their message will keep you motivated.

IMPORTANT: Be sure to grab your FREE copy of The 201 Top Motivational Quotes Ever, a reader favorite that is loaded with quotes of all sorts, including plenty more of the all-time best funny motivational quotes!
By working faithfully eight hours a day you may eventually get to be boss and work twelve hours a day.
– Robert Frost

Life is like a ten-speed bicycle. Most of us have gears we never use.
- Charles Schulz

Opportunity is always knocking. The problem is that most people have the self-doubt station in their heads turned up way too loud to hear it.
- Brian Vaszily

Some people develop a wishbone where their back bone should be.
- Anonymous

Life begins at 40 - but so do fallen arches, rheumatism, faulty eyesight, and the tendency to tell a story to the same person, three or four times.
- Helen Rowland

You grow up the day you have your first real laugh - at yourself.
- Ethel Barrymore

"DECIDE what it is you really want to do in this world, the one thing that, 150 years from now, will still cause people to exclaim, 'He was here, he did something "AMAZING.' And then grab some Tostitos and go watch ESPN. That's enough self-delusional bullshit for one day."
- Buster Guru

(don't miss Buster's funny quotes... THIS GUY IS HILARIOUS!)

I knew I was going to take the wrong train, so I left early.
- Yogi Berra

I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying.
- Oscar Wilde

I've got all the money I'll ever need, if I die by four o'clock.
- Henny Youngman
People often say that motivation doesn't last. Well, neither does bathing - that's why we recommend it daily.
- Zig Ziglar

Burn your computer. Blow up your TV. Bludgeon your cell phone. Breathe deeply. This, my friends, is the secret to inner-peace.
- Brian Vaszily

God is dead - Nietzsche Nietzsche is dead. - God

Five out of four people have trouble with fractions.
- Unknown

A clear conscience is a sure sign of a bad memory.
- Unknown
Life is not about how fast you run, or how high you climb, but how well you bounce.
- Unknown

I've developed a new philosophy... I only dread one day at a time.
- Charles Schulz

None of us is as dumb as all of us.
- Unknown

Many of us spend half our time wishing for things we could have if we didn't spend half our time wishing.
- Alexander Woollcott

If computers get too powerful, we can organize them into committees. That'll do them in.
- Unknown

I feel like a fugitive from the law of averages.
- William Mauldin

If I had a dollar for every time someone came to me with not only a problem but also a possible solution to that problem, I’d have six dollars.
- Brian Vaszily

Always remember that you are unique. Just like everybody else.
- Unknown

Remember, today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday.
- Dale Carnegie

To do is to be. -Descartes To be is to do. - Voltaire Do be do be do.
- Frank Sinatra

BONUS funny motivational quote for good luck:

Everyone is entitled to their own incorrect opinion.Most of The following funny motivational quotes and short inspirational sayings are written by me and only a few of them are the famous quotes by some great but unknown people. Feel free to put these quotations on your T-shirts, posters, Facebook statuses or tweet them on your Twitter, but do not forget to credit this page.

Funny Motivational Sayings

Shut up in work and report the boss.
A teenage guy’s life is all about operating beautiful girl’s impressions.
Nowadays students prefer Facebook Timeline on their study timetable.
I read an article last night and stats say, after a breakup the guy is most likely sleeping with a girl by the next week. Then I see all these girls on Facebook with their pictures and post and I laugh because you are all the rebound victims.
A divergence between a boss and a girlfriend is only your viewpoint.
When you break-up with someone, who says, "No I don't accept that" They feel all tough, until they're on your front porch, crying, in the rain, and you shut the porch light off on them, and lock the door.
There is always a stupid who has to mess up the plan.
Depression is not a joke and many people die from just that.
Love is like a basketball game, you need to call for time-out when you know it's time to rest.
All you need in a relationship is cheating and courage, and then divorce is sure.
The best way to make your wife happy is to surrender your dreams.
Time can heal all wounds including fail Photoshop accidents.
If you need to take a break from the anxiety of your married life, a legal divorce is often what you need.
Acne is my friend since puberty.
I don't like rich people... or rich... or people.
Demotivational posters always motivate my subconscious.
You cannot hate Monday if you want to beat Bill Gates.
I have tried to keep my mouth shut about so many different things. But maybe I’ve come to the point that I don’t care. For those of you, who still can’t get over the fact that a boss is always right, shut up already. It’s over and done.
I love how some people think jail is a joke and they can't get caught.
Men's creative minds always come in action after their breakups.
Life, I want to tell you, you were better before computers, Facebook and cell phones.
I eat a cupcake every day, because it's someone's birthday somewhere.
I hate girls, I could never have a girlfriend, and I haven’t broken up with all the beautiful girls yet.
American politics can be so amazing when you begin to look at it with the mind of an African man.
I am a fool and I am happy because intelligence giving nothing but worries.